My free birth story - Max (2024)

Going into this pregnancy, I knew I wanted a home birth if possible. So, when I found out that the Burton & Derby home birth team had closed due to staffing issues, I was gutted. I immediately made it clear to my community midwife at my first appointment that I still wanted a home birth. While she was supportive, she also mentioned that the home birth team might not reopen in time for me.

Thankfully, my pregnancy was smooth sailing, with no issues for me or the baby. However, the pregnancy experience itself was very different from my first. My first pregnancy was during Covid, so this time I had a lot more appointments, wasn’t working from home, and was generally much busier. To make things even more challenging, having a toddler to care for while pregnant is a whole new ballgame. I was absolutely exhausted!

Planning for a home/free birth with health care providers

Because I had a previous postpartum hemorrhage (PPH), I was marked as 'high risk' and had a consultant appointment at around 17 weeks. The appointment lasted all of four minutes! I was told I couldn’t give birth in the midwifery-led unit (MLU), that I'd need a cannula placed immediately upon arriving at the labor ward, and that I would need the syntocinon injection to birth the placenta. I politely declined and expressed that if a home birth wasn’t possible, I’d prefer to use the MLU. As a result, they referred me to a consultant midwife who oversaw the MLU.

At 34 weeks, I had a couple of virtual meetings with a lovely consultant midwife from Good Hope Hospital. She took the time to listen to all of my concerns and preferences, and together we created a plan that I felt comfortable with. The plan was for me to be allowed to use the MLU, and she also provided advice on how to ensure the MLU would be open when I needed it.

Still, I was determined to have a home birth if it was at all possible. So, from 28 weeks onward, I started discussing the option of giving birth at home without any midwives present. This led to a meeting with the senior community midwife at 36 weeks. She was incredibly supportive and understanding. We went over emergency protocols just in case we needed help, and she explained that while midwives couldn’t attend the birth, they could come after the baby was born (between 9 AM and 5 PM) to check us over, do the paperwork, and administer the baby’s Vitamin K shot etc.

It was at this point that I realized we were actually going to have this baby at home. After much thought, we decided to invest in a birth pool and hire a doula. I had wanted a doula for as long as I could remember, but it just wasn’t in the budget. However, we managed to book a “power hour” with a doula I absolutely loved, to discuss free birthing. After our conversation, I discovered that her virtual doula package was surprisingly affordable. Meg, @thedungareedoula, was absolutely fabulous and exactly what we needed.

Labour

By this point, I felt incredibly confident about our choice to birth at home. My due date came and went, and while I had some contractions here and there, they didn’t stick. On February 10th (40+5), we sent our 3-year-old to my parents for a sleepover, hoping for a nice, quiet morning. But baby had other plans. At 5 AM, my contractions started strong and regular right away, just like my first labor. I quickly got the TENS machine on, and my husband began setting up the birth pool. Around 7 AM, I called my best friend to come over, and by 8 AM, I was downstairs and ready for the pool. I got in the water around 8:30 AM, and by this point, we had our doula, Meg, on the phone for guidance. Her calming presence was just what we needed.

At 9:51 AM, baby Max was born in the pool. His cord was wrapped around his neck a couple of times, and there wasn’t much slack, which made it tricky to unwrap him. Thankfully, Meg kept us calm and guided us through the process. The placenta came about 45 minutes later, and we spent the next few hours snuggling on the sofa. The midwives arrived around 3 PM to check us both over. I declined stitches for a second-degree tear, which led to a much more comfortable recovery. I had thought Max was smaller than my first (who weighed 8lbs 15oz), but it turned out he weighed a whopping 10lbs 5oz! Our older son, Theo, came home for dinner and was overjoyed to meet his new baby brother.

Reflecting on the Home Birth Experience

Giving birth at home was a completely different experience, both during labor and in the early postpartum days. I am so thankful to have had the opportunity to experience it. If midwives had been available, I would have gladly had them present, but in hindsight, I honestly can’t imagine how they would have fit in without being an interruption. The peacefulness and intimacy of the experience were truly special, and I wouldn't have changed a thing.